Marriage signifies a change in position of the married couple in Roma society as full and productive members of the community. The customs and rituals for engagements and marriages described here are traditional and vary for the many Roma tribes around the world.Engagements In spite of myths of Roma immorality, most Roma follow strict rules of sexual behavior.This is a way of maintaining tribal and social purity.If a Roma male marries a gadji, his community may eventually accept her, provided that she adopts the Romani way of life.Engagements and marriages are great and joyous events for the Roma, signifying the extension and continuation of the family.For this reason, they are accompanied by great celebrations.The sad part that has changed up today , is they are not seen to travel in their colourfaul wagons as they did in the past. In a balanced family the man and the woman do not compete against one another.The man is the head of the family and the woman is the heart of it - both are important for the well being of the family.
Once married, the woman joins the husband's family, where her main job is to tend to her husband's and her children's needs, as well as to take care of her in-laws.
Strict rules stipulate girls aren't allowed to approach boys, so it's up to the males, aka the 'grabbers', to tempt the girl away from her group of friends and try to get a kiss off her, even sometimes going as far as twisting her arm.
At the climax of one young traveller couple Josie and Swanley's wedding a few weeks later, Cheyenne is seen trying to escape the attentions of one grabber, who has pinned her up against the wall outside the reception.
The power structure in the traditional Romani household has at its top the oldest man or grandfather, and men in general had more authority than women.
Women gained respect and authority as they got older.